Disposable Lives and the Single Dad

Written by Litsa Bolontzakis on. Posted in My thoughts

Our world is changing very rapidly, and our culture grows more and more disposable each day. Sometimes it seems as if people have actually become disposable, as well. Disposable lives—what does that really imply?

"Disposable" means something we use for a little while and then throw away, something with little value, like so many of the material objects we use—in no time they become utterly useless.

Does that apply to human relationships? Is it possible that they have become disposable, too? And if so, what are the consequences? Consider how a very valuable institution, marriage, has changed and became disposable. Single-parent families, which now number in the millions, are the "new normal."

When children are involved, though, the dynamics change. No matter what happens with the adults, the children have to feel valuable and never made to feel disposable. It’s the hardest project to have to do alone, and I call it a "project" because it is at least a 20-year project to raise a child.

Dear dads, can you be dependable, with the staying power that will always be there for your young ones?

Our children are growing up in a very challenging world where everything is disposable, but they need guidance and direction to acquire qualities that will help them face those challenges. If you think about it, imagine the billions of dollars worth of advertising aimed at our young ones, pushing gadgets, toys and material possessions at them. I wonder why? Because children have "nagging power," and it always works!

Here is what our children need the most, and it doesn’t cost anything—it’s free, and most importantly, not disposable.

They need to feel loved, unconditionally.

Your children like spending time with you, doing activities together in an unhurried way. They love to ask questions and hear your answers, they love to be with you and people they trust, people who love them and praise them. They love to be outdoors, rain or shine, and they want to experience everything. Simple, everyday things are what make them happy, because everything to them is fresh and new.

Dear dads, please remember that time goes by so very quickly, and that while you are teaching them with love, you are helping them develop and grow and, at the same time, helping them create wonderful memories.

Why are good memories essential in the development of a child?

Studies now show that the care babies get has dramatic and long-term effects on how children develop and learn, on how they cope with stress, and on how they react to the world around them. In fact, science tells us that the right kind of experiences in their early years can actually help our children’s brains to grow! And that those experiences can affect how they continue to learn later on in life.

Although the first year is the most important for a child’s brain development, there is a strong message that all the early years—from birth to age 10—are important. So time is too short to accomplish so much!

Here’s to you, dear dads, for being the dependable rocks in the lives of your children! By putting them first in your life, you’re proving that your children will never be disposable.

Litsa with Love!

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Litsa Bolontzakis

Litsa Bolontzakis

Children's book and cookbook author Litsa Bolontzakis is an expert on Greek cooking and that culture's easy, simple way of life. Her desire is to help other families learn from her culture how to appreciate the simple things in life and grow to enjoy the seasons and the gifts they bring.

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